This is Zelena Mills' statuses and blogs on Storybrooke Live.


  • You know what? I don't need to worry about my past. Regina doesn't even bother me anymore. I am just going to go on with my life and be the best that I can be.
  • Glinda lied to me! I'm not suppose to be the leader of the West, that little brat is suppose to be my undoing!
  • So sorry, Glinda, but your new little protege has to go. And I know exactly how to do it.

Enchanted Forest

  • Thanks to the Wizard of Oz, I was able to meet Rumplestiltskin! He should have never started training my so called "sister", he should have been training me! Why would my mother give me up the way she did?
  • I did it! I caught Rumplestiltskin's hand! I knew I could be a better student than my sister!
  • How did I fail?! I didn't fail! Rumplestiltskin's going to regret choosing Regina over me! I'm going to make him realize he should have chosen me from the very beginning!
  • Blood magic, little sister? Like that's going to keep me out.
  • They're here? Fabulous, I'll send out one of my little pets immediately. As for the castle? Have fun trying to get in, Dearies. #WickedIsComing
  • As much fun as the Queen has being evil, I'm wicked. And wicked always wins.
  • I hope you like my little addition to your curse. I'll get what I want, and I'll be the only one who knows how to defeat me! I keep telling you, wicked -always- wins. Hah!


  • How wonderful! Snow White, I mean Mary Margaret, is going to have a baby! I'll be her midwife. I'm so honored!
  • I visited a friend today. They really needed a shave.
  • In such a small town, it sure takes awhile to find certain spots. I met a lovely woman at an antique shop today, Belle I think her name was?
  • Why must everyone be afraid of little ol' me? Funerals and receptions makes me quite sad, I'm upset I wasn't invited. *smirk* #TheWickedWest
  • Oh Belle, did you really think you could take Rumplestiltskin away without the dagger? It's not going to be that easy. #TheWickedWest
  • You know, I am just so hurt that people thinks it's alright to threaten me. With empty threats, no less. Really, I'm just trying to be as helpful to you all. Aren't we all here to just be friends and make happy memories with each other? Unless anyone wants to become a flying monkey...
  • Who's ready for a #WitchFight everyone? Regina, you have five minutes to show up before I start unleashing the Dark One on all your towns people! #TheWickedWest
  • Oh, dearie me. Did I trick you, Captain? Well, let's use those pretty lips of yours for something good for a change. Kiss Swan, remove her powers... or else.
  • Well, the date could have gone better, but nevertheless, the show must go on. #DateGoneWrong
  • I managed to get Rumple to help me with my next step. It's so great having The Dark One helping me with my plan. Let's get this show on the road, shall we?
  • Hope everyone's ready for what's gonna come next. Come on Rumplestiltskin, we have a happy family to visit! #HospitalVisit #NewBaby
  • Sorry Charming family, but your baby is now my baby.
  • Please, they can't stop me. I have the Dark One's dagger. Try to stop me, Pets. I'll be winning in the end.



The Wizard of Busts

Can anyone relate to just always trying, but your father's always have to bring you down? Well, he was never /really/ my father. Apparently, my so called parents found me in the woods and decided to raise me. I know what you're probably thinking, Why is that so bad, Zelena? It doesn't make it any better when your "father" is always drinking and getting drunk off his ass! He yelled at me after I had shaved me and called me wicked. I am /not/ wicked! I have no idea why he's always badgering me and insulting me! He may not be my real father, but he raised me so shouldn't he love me? I told him I was leaving. I was going to find the one person who would appreciate me for who I am: The Wizard of Oz.

Once I got to the Wizard's castle, I couldn't believe how huge it was! It was amazing! After walking into the room, I was just so mesmerized by everything. As we began talking, the Wizard of Oz showed me images of the wizard, Rumplestiltskin and my so called sister, Regina, whom I also found out was a queen now. The Wizard gave me a pair of magical silver slippers and asked me to bring back something of Rumplestiltskin. I was going to do it so I could finally show everyone who ever doubted me I was never wicked to begin with, and that I had a purpose! At first, I was a little doubtful after actually meeting Rumplestiltskin, but after meeting him in person, I did my best to show him I was worthy of being a student. Although he could have /warned/ me that he was going to pluck a hair out of my head for that potion of his!

We began training immediately in the woods. I was shocked when Cora never even mentioned my name! Did she /really/ hate me so much that she tossed out my own existence?! Rumplestiltskin gave me a test where I had to catch him blindfolded while he basically ran everywhere he wanted. He helped me dig into my emotions so deep that I was actually able to catch his hand! I felt we hand a little bonding moment when he told me what his greatest moment was, which made me realize my greatest moment: When Rumple decided to train me!

Back at Rumples castle, I surprised Rumple with a meat pie. I was so happy that he decided to train me! Unfortunately, after he came into the castle, he shocked me by telling me he was /still/ training Regina! Was he serious?! I tried my best to show him how dedicated I was, how happy I was to be being trained by him! How dare he toss me aside like my mother Cora and cast a spell on me? My skin was turning /green/!

I sneaked into Regina's castle and decided to attack Regina. She didn't deserve anything she was getting, and I was going to kill my sister! I took a shaving tool and stabbed Regina in the neck! Unfortunately, it was Rumplestiltskin in disguise. He was absolutely insane for telling me how much I loved him. I didn't love him! The spell he casted was getting worse for I was turning more and more green. He told me he needed Regina to cast the curse to take him to a land without magic. I gave him a little revelation: I had magic to take anyone anywhere they wanted to go. If he wanted to go to a land without magic, my silver slippers could take him there. That didn't mean I was actually going to give them to him. If he wanted to tease me, then I was going to tease him back. I promised Rumplestiltskin that the next time he saw me, he was going to choose me and /not/ Regina.

Back at the Wizard of Oz, I told him to take me to the past. I was going to change it! I was pissed when the "Wizard" told me he couldn't do it. Really now? I used my magic to expose him for who he really was: A lying magic less coward! He told me no magic was strong enough to give me what I want. That's what /he/ thought. I gave myself a little idea to turn him into my own personal slave. Let's just say right now, I have my very own furry winged slave! I spied on Rumple and Regina through a looking glass and made Regina the promise of her life: When I was through with her, she would /never/ been born!

Nobody Steals My Chair

I met a woman recently. She said her name was Glinda the good witch of the South, and she was happy to see I turned the phony wizard into a flying monkey. She offered to take me to a place so I could meet my real sisters, whatever that meant. I may have given her a distrusting look, I mean, she did come out of nowhere. After taking me to the heart of Oz, she introduced me to the Witches of the East and North. I was hesitant meeting them, and when Glinda told me I could change my future for the better, I didn't know what to believe. I was wicked as I've been called that my entire life, and now some woman was telling me I didn't have to be? Even more, she told me I was to represent innocence. I just didn't think so. They had even more surprises for me. I was told I was part of the books, saying I was suppose to be the protector of Oz. I didn't know how I felt about that to be honest.

Back at the phony wizards castle, I went to spy on Regina. I was wondering if I could really do it. Could I let go of my past? Was it really that easy? I decided I was completely over Regina. I didn't need to be jealous of her when I had new friends that appreciated me. Glinda showed up and gave me a beautiful necklace. I immediately fell in love with it! I realized Glinda helped me to become myself, a witch that would be able to help others.

Glinda took me to the West to show me just how much I was now in control of. It was so beautiful, and mine! Just as we were looking, a cyclone appeared and was carrying a house. I didn't know what to think of it. We searched until we found a girl lost in the rubble. I don't know why, but I was feeling jealous that Glinda offered to take Dorothy back home with us. Didn't she just do that for me, though? I stole the Book of Records and found out exactly what the prophecy was. That Dorothy was the true sister and was suppose to stop me, a great evil!

With my true colors back and my beautiful black robes and conical hat, I went to destroy Dorothy for taking my place at the table. Unfortunately, I had no idea that the water in the bucket would melt me down to a green puddle. Fortunately, that was not the last of me. I simply rose up from the dead and I had heard everything Glinda told that little brat.

Unknown to them, I had a little plan up my sleeve. Since I wasn't destroyed, and my magic intact, I went to the Wizard's castle and impersonated him. I gave Dorothy the silver slippers and sent her packing. After she went au revoir, I extracted my revenge on Glinda and sent her to her new prison in The Enchanted Forest.

Enchanted Forest

Revenge Can Be So Sweet

Today marked a very important part of my plan to take The Evil Queen down. The curse the lost boy cast was somehow disrupted by the Evil Queen. All good things though, because The Evil Queen’s little counter curse sent all her precious peasants back to the Enchanted Forest. Something I could never understand is why everyone is by her side now. She caused everyone so much pain and heartache like she did to myself, and they’re just too forgiving of that woman! Anyway, I was lucky enough to have gotten to Regina’s castle when I did, and I even got a few pets along the way. Aurora and Phillip have been very well behaved pets, I must say. Sending one of my flying monkeys to the returnees, I asked it to get me something that would help me accomplish my plans to take over and get my revenge. With Regina’s blood, I will be able to exact my revenge and get rid of her for good. I have to admit, Regina has the most amazing clothes. I may have a thing with green, but black is definitely more my color, don't you all agree? I’m sure she won’t mind if I try on a few more pieces of clothing. Not to mention all that jewelry she left behind after casting the curse. Who would be so stupid to leave behind beautiful, expensive pieces of jewelry?! Ugh. I can’t wait to see the look on Regina’s face when she sees me again. I’m just so wicked, and you want a little piece of advice, my dears? Wicked always wins.

Sister, Sister

My shield seems to have given my sister a bit of a conundrum. The monkey I sent her way failed, which is troublesome, but given the fact my sister has a… similar level of power, it wasn’t a surprise. It would serve as further bait to bring her into my castle. I hope she likes the open invitation I left her in the tunnels.

I expected her to lower the shield like she did, but the sleeping curse I found in her hands? Oh really, dear sister, is that any way at all to welcome your big sis? She wasn’t even going to say hello to me! She had no idea who I was. I introduced myself. We verbally sparred a little, then I revealed my relationship to her. She didn’t believe me, and rudely pointed out my skin color! Ugh. Such a spoiled, privileged little girl. I’ll take everything away from her. She thinks she’s lost everything that matters, but she has no idea. She has no idea at all.


Ohhh, it’s so thrilling, being wicked. My pets told me that Baelfire and Belle were heading to the Dark One’s castle, so I placed a little friend of mine there to meet them. Lumiere told them what to find and where, leading them right into my trap. I watched Lumiere work, playing their desperation expertly, sending them to the Vault of the Dark One, just as I wanted. I beat them to the Vault and watched. It was so great that Lumiere hadn’t told them the price. Oops!

Belle just had to see through things, though. Ugh! Meddling little fool. Lumiere told her everything! It didn’t matter, though. Thankfully, that little fool Baelfire was just so desperate to get dear Daddy back that he opened the Vault despite Belle’s pleading. Hah! It was sickeningly cute, watching their family reunion. Of course, Rumpelstiltskin had to accuse me of tricking his boy. Hah. It isn’t my fault his boy wasn’t smart enough to grasp the whole “life for a life” concept.

I wanted Rumplestiltskin, so I made him choose: himself, or his son. He made the choice to save his boy, going mad in the process. Ugh. For his first task, I set him on his beloved Belle. Unfortunately, that stupid candle chose to grow a conscience at the worst possible time! No matter. I have Rumplestiltskin’s dagger.

Just goes to show, wicked always wins.

Preparations For the Future

Good help is so hard to come by. Rumplestiltskin was kind enough to drag dear Captain Hook to me in the trunk of his car. Of course, that stupid pirate didn’t do what he needed to do. I need him to kiss Emma! I need him to get rid of her magic. Ugh. Of course, he decided to fail, again, so I had to do something drastic. I sent my pets after the boy, and they failed too! I tried taking matters into my own hands, but that Swan girl still had her powers. That stung! UGH. I’ll get her dealt with, and I’ll get Snow’s baby if it’s the last thing I do!



I found an expectant mother at Granny’s, reading a book on babies. I thought she was Snow White, and I was right. I introduced myself to her, and it turned out that she had a lot of questions regarding maternity! Well, I let her know that I’m a midwife, and that seemed to brighten her day. I assured her that she’d learn quickly, and of course, Snow White -- Mary Margaret rather -- asked me for advice. I told her I’d be honored. That’s such an enjoyable treat! I wasn’t expecting that, or her joke that she might never let me leave her side. I’d find that such an honor. Such an honor indeed. Perhaps I can give her more information than that poor dog-eared book she’d been reading. I hope she realizes a lot of things in those baby books are just possibilities, and most of them often don’t harm the baby! I’ll schedule a time to meet with her and see what she knows, exactly, and what she doesn’t. I’ll need to meet the father, of course, and educate them both on this wonderful miracle known as birth!

Operation Midwife is a Go!

I had a really lovely day today here in Storybrooke! I met this lovely woman in the antique shop, Belle. I went there to buy a very special gift for Mary Margaret and her baby. There's always time to make sure a mother and her baby are well taken care of. It excites me so much when there's a bundle of joy on the way for two wonderful parents! I had gone to Mary Margaret and David Nolan's home to get well acquainted with the couple. After Mary Margaret offered to make tea, I just had to stop her right there. No mother expecting a baby should be getting up and making tea when someone like myself is already there ready to help out when I am needed. Chamomile tea is a great mixture to help calm the nerves, don't you all think? I had a lovely conversation with the Charmings, giving them advice on how the second pregnancy is much more progressive than the first. It makes me feel sad, what the Charmings went through with the first curse, and I would do anything to make them feel better. You know what they say, “It's better to get your fears all out on the table!” Feeling bad, I let Mr. Nolan get back to his duties while I stayed with Mary Margaret back at the loft. I feel so lucky to have met the Charmings when I did! I am going to be there to support them, and help them out with anything they need.

Midwife Panic

Mary Margaret called me in a panic! It seems as though her baby isn’t moving. I rushed to the grocery store and bought some orange juice - Andana brand, so delicious! - and took it over to her apartment. She was astonished by my speed. When a patient is that panicked, of course I’m going to be quick! I assured her that everything was fine, and told her that when a baby is close to delivery, they stop moving for long periods. Orange juice always does the trick, in my experience. I knew some of her anxiety was due to the rumors about the Wicked Witch. I hope they find her soon. Mary Margaret felt useless. How can anyone feel useless when they’re creating a whole new person? Honestly! Of course, the orange juice worked. I let Mary Margaret know I’d be at her side during delivery. She’s not having that baby without me.

Cover Blown

There’s something about funerals that makes me feel torn inside. Such a sad day for everyone, don’t you agree? Earlier today, I paid a visit to Granny’s to join everyone in mourning the loss of their loved one, Baelfire. I don’t know what it is about me that makes everyone squirm. I am just little ol’ me after all. After watching everyone freak out in my presence, I let Regina in on a little secret: She’s in fact my little sister. Oh trust me, I’m feeling as dread and disappointed as the rest of you. I gave Regina a little gift to let her dig into the past and I told her to meet me at sundown so I can finally destroy her forever.

It’s funny really how everyone runs out and does whatever they could to protect their little town. It’s amusing, really. You know what would have been great? To just stay put and watch Regina pout and shout screaming how unfair everything was for her now. Another thing about this town I don’t get is why must everyone interfere in where they do not belong? It really was great seeing Belle’s face so, so sad and teary-eyed. Ha! The time had finally come for me to get prepared for my meeting with Regina. It was very exciting seeing all those people down at the square where my battle with Regina was going to be.

At first I thought Regina wasn’t going to show, and that would have been magnificent. I gave her five minutes to show, but she never came. The Savior wanted to have a go at me, but I never gave her the chance. What an amateur that girl is! When Regina showed up, she asked me what I had done to her. Seriously, she didn’t know? And after I answered her, she slapped me, the little minx! She tried to drop something on me, but I just tossed it aside. You can do better than that, little sis! I tried to rip out her heart, but she was smart enough to take it out. Ugh, the brat! Why can't I just win once so she can back off?! At the end of the day, I locked Rumpelstiltskin back in his cage where he belongs, like a little obedient dog. I told him I wasn't going to cast a curse, I was going to cast a second chance, and this time I am going to win!

Tricks and Treats

I spent the entire day with Captain Hook to corrupt his love. I knew his dirty secret, I knew it haunted him. I knew he could use him. If he kisses his dear Emma Swan, all her magic will be taken. She won’t be a threat to me anymore because he loves her. I’ll make sure he kisses her. He’s too perceptive for his own good. Fortunately for me, he only has two choices: kiss her, or everyone she loves dies. We’ll see how this little pirate obeys.

Date Night

Distractions are my specialty. That is why I paid my little sis a visit so I could send Rumpelstiltskin on a mission: To take Regina's heart. I'm not sure if anyone thinks I'll just drop everything and stop what I want accomplished. What's even better is that I actually accomplished my goal! The Dark One successfully took Regina's heart, and now I have it in my possession! Isn't it great how things just works out for the best? I placed it in a very safe place while I had a nice conversation with my flying furry pet. Oh! I also had a decent date with Rumple. With Charming’s courage and Regina's heart, I only need one more thing to accomplish everything I planned out to do a year ago: Rumple's brain.

Later that night, I was very impressed by how handsome The Dark One looked. I pick out the best outfits, don't I? Honestly, I think he has a crush on me. Actually, no, it's not true at all. I knew he just wanted to know all my secrets. So, what did I do? I told him what he wanted to hear, of course! I told him my plan would be able to bring back his son, Bae. He was a bit against my plans, but I informed him magic never failed, only people. Which is true, I believe. I was going to get the life I deserved, and as a bonus? Rumplestiltskin gets exactly what he truly wants, too.

It became quite interesting by the end of the "date" though. The Dark One actually thanked me after I explained everything to him. I was confused, mind you. It came as a bit of a shock when The Dark Ones attitude suddenly changed. We began to have a moment, if you guys know what I mean. That is, until I caught him red handed! Trying to steal the knife from me? He ruined all his chances to be reunited with his son! How dare he think he can fool me, the Wicked Witch?! I was furious with the fool. That was the last time he was ever going to hurt me, besides I have something to plan. So until then, Loves!

I Need Her Handled!

Good help is so hard to come by. Rumplestiltskin was kind enough to drag dear Captain Hook to me in the trunk of his car. Of course, that stupid pirate didn’t do what he needed to do. I need him to kiss Emma! I need him to get rid of her magic. Ugh. Of course, he decided to fail, again, so I had to do something drastic. I sent my pets after the boy, and they failed too! I tried taking matters into my own hands, but that Swan girl still had her powers. That stung! UGH. I’ll get her dealt with, and I’ll get Snow’s baby if it’s the last thing I do!